love your body
Originally uploaded by Ashley Norwell Photography

Loving your body is cultivated through developing a deeper respect and love for yourself as a whole. While physicality certainly is not everything when it comes to who we are, it is a big part of how we see ourselves and of course how others view us too. In a world where first impressions are pivotal, projecting your best you on the outside could not be more important. This does not mean losing site of who you are on the inside to focus merely on wearing the right clothes, best makeup or striving to be the skinniest/curviest/sexiest. It's more about ensuring you are content with the version of you that you are putting out there each day. Accepting and developing a confidence that will be evident in your demeanour and physicality. Respecting and loving your body can be ascertained through eating the right foods, getting active several times a week, accentuating your best features and allowing your inner beauty to shine through in your physical self expression (be it with makeup, jewellery, style or simplicity!). Body love is about correctly channelling our ambitious energy to create a physical self that fills us with joy and excitement every day!

Every day we put up loads of barriers to stop us from reaching a place where we can say that we truly love and respect our bodies, just as they are. Our barriers can range from the stock archetypal excuses that we apply to everything we haven't quite yet achieved: I don't have time, It's too hard, I don't know where to start! But lacking a love for your body we've been blessed can run a little deeper than than these simple excuses we apply when posed with the question of why we have yet to start our university assignment. When it comes to loving the our body we also come up against inner emotional conflict that we may be harbouring such as low self esteem levels and a lack of self respect.

In order to break down these barriers we need to recognise them in ourselves and decide that we want better than any sort of negativity that exists in ourselves. Ask yourself how you will be able to demand respect from those around you if you don't give respect to yourself. Remember that while respect is so much to do with characteristics other then simply our physicality, a portion of how we view ourselves certainly DOES comes from what we see when we look in the mirror, but this does not have to be a negative thing! It's about actualisation of body love goals and acceptance of the body you are rocking, after all it is the only one you'll ever have. When it comes to yourself, settling for mediocrity is not okay! You have just one chance to live this life the way you want to live it. You have just one body to get you through, why not make it your best possible? You wouldn't by a beat up 25 year old car & attempt a road trip from LA to NYC, would you? Then best not attempt to get from okay to fabulous with an unhealthy body & battered sense of self love - you know you won't make it.

The first step towards cultivating any sort of affirmative action towards body love is recognising whatever it is you consider your flaws. So open up the moleskine and get writing. Make a list of all the things you are unhappy with. Done? Ok, divide your list into two columns- "Stuff I Have The Power To Adapt" and "Stuff I Will Soon Accept & Love!". Some of the sorts of things you might have on the first list could include: hair style, size of thighs (collective sigh?). One your other list will be stuff like: height, size of nose (!), dimples, freckles.

For each item on your "Stuff I Have The Power To Adapt" list, make a plan of action, it doesn't need to be much, just a simple sentence will do. For example, if you are unhappy with your hair colour you could resolve to pick up a box of Loreal colour next time you're at the supermarket or get your hairdresser to suggest a new style of cut. Perhaps, as so many of us tend to be at one stage or another, you are unhappy with your current weight. Think about what you are doing in your current lifestyle to ensure you are at your body's "happy weight": are you eating right most of the time, exercising a few times a week? If you are already doing these things then you are already on your way - put this one on the other list (do it! you don't need a plan, you need acceptance & respect). If you aren't doing the best you can in this regard, you plan might be to add more fresh foods into your diet or go for a jog on the weekends with a bunch of girlfriends.

Moving onto your second list, "Stuff I Will Soon Accept & Love!". Quite aptly named, the goal of this list is for you to recognise these characteristics of yourself as quirks that are special and make you YOU, rather then negative aspects that detract from your ultimate self. Big nose, freckles, dimples, big shoulders, too skinny, too curvy and so forth. First comes realising that you are not alone in your nose, freckly, dimple, shoulder, weight loathing battle! Second of all, you need to stop beating up on yourself and accept that this is the way you were made and you should be making the most of it- not criticizing it. You could find yourself some positive role models that share your features, look at how they work it to their advantage and adopt their sunshine outlook.

Another fantastic way to develop a greater sense of acceptance is by learning the serenity prayer (you don't necessarily need to be religious to find meaning in this gem!). recite this to yourself, pin it on your fall, jot it in your journal and remind yourself that you are a fabulous person.

Grant me the serenity of mind to accept that which cannot be changed; the courage to change that which can be changed, and the wisdom to know the one from the other.

Another point of action is to realise any negative habits that are halting your progress towards a happy & healthy body. Some of these habits might include smoking, eating lots of fatty or sugary foods, abusing illegal drugs, binge drinking or self harm such as cutting. Recognition of these habits as detrimental to your overall self as well as to your body is the first step to giving them the kick. Seeking support and assistance from friends, family or professionals can often be the most effective path to overcoming these sorts of behaviours as sometimes it is not as simple as stopping the action (ie. to stop smoking/drinking) - it is important to also understand why you made these behaviours an acceptable part of your routine. It is also pivotal to not see overcoming these actions as giving something up, as you are not giving up anything, you are taking back your health. However, by continuing these sorts of behaviours you are giving up your right to a healthy body and ultimately a great body image.

Remember to channel all of your energy positively. Don't judge others out of jealously- compliment them. Don't wish for better clothes or a skinnier or curvier frame: love what you have and make the most of it.

Acknowledging that body image is not just about your WEIGHT!

Time for another list. This time it's about what you love about you (and no, you do not get to write 'Nothing'!). Keep this list someone safe & easily accessible, like your journal, handbag or pin board in your bedroom. Every time you are feeling down read over the list and remember that you are a fabulous individual!

Think about the songs that make you most happy. Put together a play list for those times when you are stuck in a bit of a self loathing rut and need to reach a more positive and self affirming frame of mind. A TL favourite is Mika, he is one fabulous fellow that certainly knows how to do positive!

Journal any compliments you get, no matter how trivial they seem. Use this as another reflection page for those moments of self doubt.

Recognise that it is absolutely okay to covet things & people but remember that you are an individual. You love others for their funky style, but becoming a carbon copy is not the right way to go about actioning your admiration! You must make peace with your body and do what works best for you!

How do you achieve body love? What is your favourite part of your physical self and why is it so great?